Ugh. When will I get over it?

Tim has nothing to do with his ex wife unless she e-mails him about their son. She tried to kill him. His family knows this. Yet, for some reason, some of his family is still in contact with her. I can understand wanting to be in Tim's son's life...but I don't know. I can't even get my thoughts straight about this. Every time I type something out, it sounds so ridiculous. Like I think his sisters talking to his ex-wife is on par with them disowning him. Is it really? No. But I don't understand how they could still talk to someone who tried to kill their brother. Or how they could still talk to someone that their brother hates that much. It just bothers me.

I feel like his sisters have more of a relationship with his ex-wife than they ever will with me. And that's a fairly accurate estimation. Tim has nothing to do with his family anymore. For the past 8 year or more he has had to call them. They would never call him first for anything. In the past two years that he has been with me, we didn't find out about a single family gathering until the day of the event or the day before. It's like we were an after-thought. That makes him feel like they don't care about him. Who wants to talk to people if you think they don't care about you?

Another thing that bothers me is that his ex-wife knew his mother. His mother died 10 years ago this month. His ex knew her and I never will.

I know that there isn't anything that will change any of this, all I can do is accept it and move on. And I do accept it, more often than not I don't even think about it. But then there are some days where it just really pisses me off. Sure, I could delete his sisters from my facebook and their numbers from my phone, but I don't want to do that. I want to know what's going on in their life. I want to have a relationship with them. But how can I do that if he won't? I don't want to go behind his back and have a relationship with them. He isn't going to budge on his family any time soon, especially if they continue to talk to his ex.

I don't know. I guess someday I won't care. Until then, I guess I get mildly irritated every time I see his ex comment on their facebook.

The most recent comment was "Remember what I told you last night, mom is there with you and if you ever need to talk, I'm here for you. Love you." It REALLY pisses me off that she refers to their mom as "mom" instead of "your mom." And when you hate someone as much as you hate your ex-husband, how could you possibly "love" his family? I just don't get it.

I know I sound like a horrible person. I just can't help it right now.